I Would Rather Be With Edward Cullen Than Be With Some Church Person

Fellow Blogger writes... in response to Twilight's Blood Soaked Romance

Are you serious i dont aprove of this article at all no ok first of all twilight is alsome i would read that faster than i wll read the bible please and dont give me a response about your believes ok please you say that kids should be themselves and read now that im reading ALOT your going to tell me to read something more good for my spirit well NO! i agree on every single word that Karen had said ok i would rather be with edward cullen than be with someone thats a church person. thanks for reading..

Jasmin J. Cullen

Bye

Beloved By Him replies...

We’re not surprised that people are offended by the truth of the Word of God, or that you see us as the bad guys trying to take something away from you that you enjoy. It would be easy to flatter people and justify sin in order to be popular, but that would make us enemies of God. We love Him and respect and fear Him and His word too much to compromise how we share His truth. And hopefully you will believe me when I say that we also love you, too, or we wouldn’t be in this ministry. We aren’t here to put you down, or to be critical of your feelings. We want you to have a great life that’s full of joy and happiness! So when we speak out against something that is deceptive, such as the Twilight series, it’s to help our readers understand that even though something comes in a good-looking package, it can still be rotten at its core. I know you don’t like when I say that, but stay with me a little longer, and keep reading…

I can see that you feel really strongly about the character of Edward. It’s awesome to think about having a powerful, handsome guy be totally in love with us. Every woman wants that. God gave us that desire to love and be loved, and He wants it to be permanent. Eccl. 9:9 says that a man is supposed to live joyfully with his wife all the days of his vain life under the sun, because that’s God’s will for him. And God wants our man to be strong, to pursue us, and to make a statement to the world about how much he loves us. He needs to be a one-woman guy, who appreciates our beauty and wants to take care of us. Most importantly, he’s supposed to love us with Christ’s love, a love that comes from God and is centered in His word, so that he can help us draw closer to God in our own lives. All of these qualities are described in the Bible, and they are not fictional. They are real, just as God is real, and I can tell you that because I have blessed to be married to a real flesh-and-blood man who has walked through the fire with me and for me. There is the perfect guy out there for you, too, one who will be willing to lay down his life for you, not the way it happens in some story that was created by people in the world who don’t know the love of Jesus Christ. True love and desire come from God; it’s a love that’s stronger than death, it can’t be bought or bargained for, and it can’t be quenched or drowned out by what comes against it. That’s the kind of love that Jesus has for us, that caused Him to die a gory, bloody death on the cross for us, so that we could live with Him forever in paradise (references from Song of Solomon, John 15, I Corinthians 13, Ephesians 6, Hebrews 9 & 10).

The world wants to put a dark spin on love, to make it more dramatic and more sensual, so that it can pull on our feelings and keep us in turmoil. That way, we stay oblivious to the fact that we can’t find God’s love in what the world has to offer. God is the source of love, and in Him is no darkness at all (I John 1:5, 4:7). If we belong to Christ, and are children of God, we are supposed to walk in the light and have no fellowship with the darkness of sin, including the occult, demonic forces, and vampirism (II Cor. 6:14-18). That means not reading books that don’t accurately portray the love of Christ or the importance of receiving His salvation so that our eternal life will be in heaven with Him. (That’s another important point to make: Eternal life does not begin here on this earth, as it does for the vampires of Twilight; it begins after we die and are judged by God. See Hebrews 9:27)

Don’t allow yourself to be fooled into buying the cheap imitation of love that the world is offering through the Twilight books. Instead, I would challenge you to read and learn about the One Who loves you since before the beginning of this world, Who wants to bring you into His kingdom, and wants to give you real eternal life. The book of Revelation describes what He will look like when we see Him:

“Now I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse. And He who sat on him was called Faithful and True, and in righteousness He judges and makes war. His eyes were like a flame of fire, and on His head were many crowns. He had a name written that no one knew except Himself. He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God. And the armies in heaven, clothed in fine linen, white and clean, followed Him on white horses. Now out of His mouth goes a sharp sword, that with it He should strike the nations. And He Himself will rule them with a rod of iron. He Himself treads the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of Almighty God. And He has on His robe and on His thigh a name written: King of Kings and Lord of Lords”. (Rev. 19:11-16).

That’s my eternal Beloved, my Savior, and He wants to be yours, too. I truly hope and pray that you will open your heart to Him, and everything He wants to give you. He wants you to hunger and thirst for righteousness, not for blood (Matt. 5:6). He already shed His for you. Think about it.

Sincerely,

Beloved By Him

A True Friend Seeks Wisdom On Behalf of Another

Anonymous says...

Hi...Im having a little trouble with giving my bestfriend advice and the comfort she needs...Her boyfriend taking her throught alot of changes and trials...1) she's pregnant and one top of that she found out she has Chlamydia, so can u help with some aspiring words of advice. Thank YOU

Beloved by Him said...

It’s a true friend that seeks wisdom on behalf of another. I am glad to see your care and concern for her, because she is going to need a lot of support. Being pregnant can be difficult enough under the best of circumstances; when there’s physical and emotional complications, it can sometimes feel overwhelming. If you can encourage your friend to lean on and trust God’s promises for her life, you’ll be helping her build a strong foundation that will bless her now, and in the future.

The most important thing you can let her know is that Jesus Christ loves her, and He died and rose again to save her from her sins and give her eternal life. Hopefully, she’s already a Christian, but if she hasn’t accepted Christ as her Savior yet, share with her ABC’s of salvation: That all have sinned in God‘s eyes, that she needs to believe in her heart that Jesus died for her sins, and that she has to confess her sins and accept His righteousness as her own. She may not be ready to give her life to the Lord right now, and that’s okay--God is merciful to whomever He chooses (Rom. 9:18), and you can continue to pray that He takes good care of her, and His goodness will lead her to repentance (Romans 2:4). Remind her of the truth of God’s love for her, no matter what she’s done and regardless of her situation (Rom. 5:8).

There‘s also a specific section of Scripture you can show her that addresses a lot of the issues she’s dealing with, and how the Lord will take care of her. Psalm 103 is full of examples of God’s goodness to His children, specifically His healing power in her body, His merciful forgiveness of her sins, and His eternal salvation for those who love Him.

Let her know that her heavenly Father covers her with loving-kindness and tender mercies, and rescues her life from destruction--even the problems that we’ve caused by our own mistakes (Ps. 103:4). He can heal any disease that she is afflicted with (v.3), and is skillfully at work forming the unborn child in her womb (Ps. 139:13-16). He is not angry with her, and will not punish her according to what she’s done (v.9-10). Yes, things may be difficult, but they are definitely not hopeless. The Lord will be sympathetic to her situation if she is willing to turn from her mistakes and walk with Him (v.13). He doesn’t expect us to be perfect; but He does want us to follow His word and His will for our lives. Show her how He promises to give her and her children, and even generations after them, His mercy and righteousness if she will choose to give Him her trusting obedience (v.17-18).

She has already found favor in God’s eyes by not having an abortion. The Lord has given her this child as a reward (Ps. 127:3), and He will use even these difficult circumstances for good in her life (Rom. 8:28). I’m not sure of the nature of the relationship between her and her boyfriend, but if she is pregnant and not married, she has some serious decisions to make. Encourage her to make the Lord her first love and priority, and to make godly choices regarding her boyfriend so that the Lord will be able to bless and protect her and her child (Matt. 6:33). See if they will consider attending a good Bible-believing church and utilizing some of their support and/or resources so that she can get good spiritual and emotional care. If he’s not interested, then hopefully you can go with her. Also, try to keep an awareness of her physical state, if she’s keeping doctor’s appointments, if she’s eating right, and trying to keep her stress levels down. I know it’s a lot of responsibility for you, but we are told in Matt. 5:41 to not just go one mile with our friend, but two. You will be putting feet to your faith and doing a wonderful work on her behalf (James 2:16).

God may well have put you into her life “for such a time as this”, to give her support, lend a hand to help and a shoulder to cry on, and help bear this burden that she literally has to carry (Esther 4:14, Gal.6:2). By being a true friend to her, you are showing her Christ’s love and fulfilling His law, and you will both be blessed because of it.

Sincerely,

Beloved by Him

The Letter That Changed Me

Written by Tiffany Stuart

Cross Post from Ungrind

I sat in front of my computer about to do something I never imagined doing: write a letter to my molester.

A few days prior, my husband casually mentioned his upcoming business trip. I felt sick and angry inside when I heard where. Attached to this city name were memories from thirty-three years ago I’d rather forget.

I never told my parents what happened to me in second grade. Shame kept me quiet until I was in high school. I have no idea why, but one day I casually told a relative what happened. Maybe I needed to be heard and understood. I felt self-conscious sharing what I remembered, like I was making things up.

Not a single tear was cried over my abuse—not during, not after, not ever. When I told a few trusted friends about my past, I emotionally separated myself and told it as a “long, long time ago this happened to me” story. My lack of tears convinced me I was OK. But deep down, I knew better. Hearing a city name awoke something inside of me I buried alive decades earlier. Pain.

I knew I needed to get to the root of my pain. After a conversation with my family, I googled this guy’s full name. I cried what I now call my “death cry” with what I uncovered.

My memories were true.

I wasn’t crazy.

My worst fears realized: This multimillionaire—a repeated sex offender—spent his entire life molesting children! Nothing stopped him. His wealth spared him. And the worst part was I wasn’t his only victim. His track record ripped through state lines like a tornado and left devastation in the hearts of many young boys and girls.

Sorrow and outrage shook me to my core. I wanted to stand up for every child he had ever hurt. I also wanted to die. Now what? Clueless, I sobbed one minute and then walked around numb the next.

For some reason I needed to know if this monster was still alive, so I paid $13.95 to search site to find out. He was! Now in his early 80’s with health issues, he violated probation only a few years prior. Still a sick, sick man!

I had to make a decision. I couldn’t ignore my past any longer. I could either go after this creep once and for all—or let him go. Torn with emotions, I prayed, journaled, and talked with family and friends.

A few days later, I sat alone with my laptop and stared at a blank word document. Time to give this guy a piece of my mind. I prayed, took deep breaths, teared up, and started typing. At first I struggled to find words. What words are strong enough to describe what he did? None. After a page of sharing with him my experience and pain, I decided it was time to say I’m done. As I continued, I asked him hard questions. I even probed into what he might be thinking now as an old man about to meet his Maker. I told him what saved me from destroying myself: my faith in Jesus.

Something amazing happened as I kept writing.

I wrote words I never dreamed of writing. Words about forgiveness and love and the hope of heaven. The strangest feeling came over me as wrote out a salvation prayer and invited him to know my Healer. My heart soared with peace and joy. I felt more alive and full of God’s love than ever before. The weight of unforgiveness after all those years finally lifted.

The next day I sent the letter unsigned with no return address. It was finished. I was free! Who knew I could actually pen words of love and forgiveness to one of the most evil of men?

God did. He gets all the credit.

That day I witnessed a real miracle—a miracle in my heart. The healing power of forgiveness. God in action.

This experience taught me a couple truths I hope I never forget.

Never hold onto unforgiveness. It’s not worth it. Unforgiveness is a heavy yoke.

Forgiveness is hard to do—and sometimes takes decades (in my case)—but it brings freedom. Freedom to heal. Freedom to love.
No matter how bad the offense feels, I’m learning the best path is straight towards forgiveness. Lewis B. Smedes’s quote says it best: "To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you."

For over thirty years, I was held captive by unforgiveness. Today I feel the difference. I’m lighter—not physically—but mentally and emotionally and spiritually.

Since this letter, I’ve thought over and over again about Jesus’ words as He hung dying on the cross. He said, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). How could Jesus just let these offenders of the hook after all they did to Him? His words make no sense. Did Jesus know something they didn’t? Did His heart soar with peace and joy as He spoke forgiveness? Even as Christ was dying, did He feel completely alive and full of love by releasing His offenders? I bet He did.

God is love! His ways are not our ways.

I also think about how Christ treated the criminal hanging next to Him. Jesus did not say, “It’s too late, buddy. Die without hope." Instead He said, “See you in paradise.” Not a cold shoulder, but a warm embrace.

Jesus showed us a different way of living. He lived out forgiveness in action. It’s taken me decades to really grasp the benefit of true forgiveness.

I’m thankful for the freedom I now feel with my childhood sexual abuse. I no longer hold unforgiveness in the dark corners of my heart. I no longer cringe inside when I heard that city name. Sure, that city will always have an ugly memory attached to it, but now it has been topped with God’s healing love. I choose to focus on that.

It's true with God all things are possible (Matthew 19:26). The letter I wrote is proof of that to me.

I'm Sorry

Written by: Blessed and Highly Favored

I’m Sorry:

I always argued with you.
I never listened to you.
I wasted my potential on immediate gratification.
I gave away the precious things I thought as common.
I held on to my anger.
I didn’t forgive.
I let fear rule me.
I couldn’t think further than the next ten minutes.
I used you.
I didn’t value you.
I’m always quick to criticize.
I stomped all over your heart.
I made you feel uncertain and worthless.
I thought I could find my worth and identity in a man.
I loved you with conditions.
I always fall short.
I never think about anyone other than myself.
I’m selfish.
I’m prideful.
I wasn’t there when you needed me.
I thought you needed a friend when what you really needed a parent.
I never told you that you were the best thing in my life.
I let you raise yourself.
I wasn’t strict enough.
I let other things get in the way of us.
I let the little things slide.
I never told you about G-d, and just let you figure things out on your own.
I wanted to spend time with my friends than spend time with you doing things that you wanted to do.
I haven’t told you in a long time how precious and valuable you are to me. And that if you were to go away and leave me, my heart would break and I would cry for your return.
I got lost and became something I never wanted to be.

Please forgive me. I’m sorry and I need a second chance. Jesus has come into my heart and I’ve become a Born Again mom. I want to start all over again. Please let me into your life and let me love you the way the Lord wants me to love you; totally, completely, entirely. I will not give you up to the world to raise you because all it can provide to you is a slow death. And Jesus is all about life. Let me in please. I love you.

Mom

In this Christmas season, let us remember it was not Jesus as a baby who paid the price of our salvation, but a grown man who made the decision to give up His life for ours. Remember His Love, and allow yourself the vulnerability to love tenaciously. Merry Christmas.

Thankful

Cross posting from Saved by Faith [blog site]

THANKFUL:

FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.


FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.


FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.


FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM EMPLOYED.


FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN SURROUNDED BY FAMILY AND FRIENDS.


FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.


FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE


FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING, AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME


FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.


FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION


FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM WARM.


FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY BECAUSE IT MEANS I CAN HEAR.


FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE PLENTY OF CLOTHES TO WEAR.


FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.


FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE!!!.

I Like Him But He Says He Loves Me

A Friend Wrote: hi. im just ritin to u kuz u know i trst u not to say nutthin therez dis boy dat i like alot i met him in skool last year but like he always tell me he lovez me but i dnt feel that way wi him i dnt love him but i like him

Saved By Faith Replied: There is a big difference between liking and loving someone and I’m glad to hear that you know the difference between the two and don’t say “I love you” to just anyone. I know, as a teenager, emotions and hormones run wild and it’s so easy to get caught up in saying something you don’t really mean. Love is a very powerful word and should not be used lightly. He probably likes you (a lot) but thinks ‘love’ is the appropriate word for it. First thing’s first, be honest with him.

Let him know that you think he’s fun and you like hanging around him but you don’t love him. If he saying ‘I love you’ makes you uncomfortable, you have to let him know. Try to speak to him in a neutral, calm way. It’s always easier to get your point across when you speak out of love instead of harsh words.

Proverbs 16:24
Kind words are like honey—sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.

Being honest is always the best way to go.

Truth shall spring up from the earth, and righteousness shall look down from heaven. Psalm 85: 11

Love,

Saved By Faith

PS - The women of WeUsed2bu love and care about your eternal soul. Therefore, we must tell you that there will be a day when each of us will have to stand before God and be judged for all we have done on this Earth. To find out how you can have right standing with God CLICK HERE


Have a question or topic idea?
Read Scriptures by Subject
Read our counselors' testimonies

Mission For Mr.Right

Written by: Trophy of Grace

I remember when I was desperate for love. I chased love and attention from any guy that was willing to pretend to even care. I sold myself short all the time dating guys that just wanted one thing from me. I have always been a pretty intuitive chick so it was no surprise to me when I found out that they were just using me, so I told myself that I was just using them too. In a sense I really was. We did not love or respect each other.

“I love you” was muttered to those guys that I thought could possibly be the one, but I quickly learned that love isn’t cheating, sex, lying, and manipulating. However that was the love I got and that was the love I learned to give.

Deep down inside my heart was hidden underneath layers of denial, hurt, betrayal, loneliness, and sadness longing to have a love that was something special and different from the rest. I needed someone to love and cherish me. I wanted to be some man’s everything. My mission for love and Mr. Right only lead me to lust and infatuation in the arms of Mr. Wrong every time. When would I finally be someone’s wifey?

I wish I knew then what I know now, that we don’t need to go around looking for Mr. Right. He will come and find us when the time is right and appointed by God. All we have to do is leave it in God’s hands and change our focus in life from searching for love in all the wrong places to receiving love from the One who gives True Love.

Instead of desperately seeking a relationship with a man we are to first diligently seek a relationship with the One who loves us more than words can say. He is the lover of our souls. He is the one who can give us the desires of our hearts. He is the one that we can depend on and cast all of our cares on. He is the one that has good gifts to give us because He cherishes us with all of His heart. He will not leave us or abandon us. He will not lie, deceive, and hurt us. He sacrificed His son on the cross for us so that we can be saved and live life more abundantly. God Almighty has us constantly on His mind. He longs to have an intimate relationship with us.

Matthew 6:33 “But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things [taken together will be given you besides.

Having a real personal relationship with God before searching for our soul mate is the wisest thing we could ever do. The Lord will teach us about real Love. Receiving His love and spending time with Him will teach us how to love others. Our minds will be renewed and changed. We will be healed and equipped to be the helpmate to the man that God has ordained for us.

While you are being taught and renewed by the Word of God the Lord will also be molding and preparing your future husband. At the same time our Lord will be making a way for your paths to cross one day, if they haven’t already. He is the best match maker because He knows what you both want and most of all what you need.

Abort your mission to find your soul mate. Start pursing a romance with the Lover of Your Soul. He will make you feel cherished, adored, beautiful, and loved. Then when Mr. Right comes you will be ready to serve each other the way God intended. Seek first God’s will for your life.

What’s Love Got To Do With It – Part 2

Written by: Blessed and Highly Favored

You see it all over: Girls with girls; guys with guys; threesomes, foursomes, grouping, hooking up, booty calls. Experimenting with your sexuality trying to cover all the bases before you decide what could possibly make you happy. And this old excuse, “It’s like trying on shoes before you buy them. You never know what style you’ll like.” Uh yeah, like I’m a shoe. I don’t think so.

First, God’s perspective about homosexuality…uh, an abomination (repugnant, disgraceful, atrocious, wickedness) Leviticus 18:22. Not only is it a sin against the will of God, it is a sin against your own body.

“Foods for the stomach and the stomach for foods, but God will destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. And God both raised up the Lord and will also raise us up by His power. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For "the two," He says, "shall become one flesh." But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's.” ( 1 Corinthians 6:13-20 )

Now typically, men and women have different perspectives about sex, both straight and homosexual.



Women who dabble into homosexual relationships, seek emotional intimacy first, that gives way to physical, sexual intimacy. A female partner doesn’t mind talking about every little thing, how they feel, their dreams, insecurities, etc. A homosexual man is quick to accept physical, sexual intimacy as a means to replace/separate emotional intimacy. Multiple partners is way of life and extremely dangerous, not only unhealthy (don’t even get me started about condom use as safe), but essentially begins to desensitize the individual.

Try this exercise. Take a piece of tape, and start placing it on and off your body about 20 times. After you do that, does the tape stick to anything anymore? No. When we have multiple sex partners, the tape is like our hearts. We can’t connect emotionally with anybody anymore and we can’t understand why we act the way we act. Our hearts become full of scar tissue. Like a thick fortress, our hearts are full of love but it cannot get out and the love from another cannot get in.

When we choose to listen to Satan, and chase after his perversion, it is very difficult to seek after God. However, because Jesus died for ALL our sins, we become new creations in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17, Galatians 6:15). Once we have this new life, we don’t have to act the way we used to act, talk like we used to talk, think the way we used to think. And though Satan would like to bring up our past to torture us, we have a Savior, in Jesus who ransomed us and paid the penalty for our sin in full.

We can choose to be free, and not a slave to our past.

*** Continued from What's Love Got To Do With It ***

What's Love Got To Do With It?

Written by: Blessed and Highly Favored

I got issues; issues about girls giving up their treasure in exchange for the illusion of intimacy. The line is long a and filled with girls and women who have shattered hopes, unrealistic expectations, a lifetime of STD’s, twisted sexual desires and mental anguish about their actions. What am I talking about? Is this another chat about sex, yes; but let’s look at the spiritual aspect of God’s gift to us.

It’s inevitable; someday, someone who you are not married to will utter the tired, worn line, “If you love me, then show me how much you love me.”

See the trap? Have you placed yourself in a situation that the “temptation” to give yourself over into sexual sin too great? But he loves me and I so want him to make me “feel like a woman!” Isn’t that a “natural response” to someone who you have a special, strong connection with? Whether you’re 12 or 62, it’s that same battle. And don’t for a second believe that the teen, or 20, or 30 or 40 or 50 something female has a clue about their sexuality, especially if they do not have a strong commitment to Jesus Christ. Satan wants to rob you of God’s precious gift and pervert your perception of sex. Hold up; stand back. Let’s look at the situation in its’ real context.

Sex is a wonderfully exciting fulfilling act. God made our bodies to react to certain stimuli in a specific manner for a specific reason. Our bodies were fantastically made by God to experience these feelings and responses layered in complex emotions. God even sanctifies (to make holy or sacred; to be free from sin, purified) sex by telling His creation, Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1:28). But all of this is meant only in the context of marriage, NOT JUST A RELATIONSHIP (48 months or 48 minutes)! And certainly not someone who has to talk you into surrendering your gift, just to prove something. And another thing, oral sex is sex. Simply because there’s no penetration with a penis, an orgasm is an orgasm if someone brings you to climax.



God gave us this physical experience which is first spiritual, then physical. Let’s define some terms. Sex is seeking gratification to satisfy a biological drive. And if you believe we come from apes or some primordial slime, it’s just a skip and a jump to justify satisfying an animalistic urge. Making love , on the other hand, is the meaningful, fulfilling, spiritual expression of the consummation of a marriage. A husband submits to his wife, as a wife submits to her husband to bring one another to a level of exciting intimacy the God intended for us as a gift. In Hebrews 13:4, the Bible says, “Marriage is honorable ( admirable, moral, respectable, good) among all, and the bed undefiled (unsoiled, precious, free from deformity, debased, or impaired): but fornicators (sex before marriage) and adulterers (sex outside of marriage) God WILL judge.”

So, that’s God perspective of His gift to us. We need to see ourselves from His vantage point, not as animals just having sex because it’s “natural.” The big lie of Satan is that “everybody is doing it,” “it’ll make me a man,” “it’ll make me a woman,” “but we love each other” etc. We are not animals who cannot reason, or think of consequences, or just live in the moment. We are divinely created by a loving God, who wants us to be Holy, full of purpose and direction. He wants us to be all we can be, all He created us to be.

Internet Love

Anonymous Asks:
Hey. Well Im having a difficult time right now. Im not really sure what to do. I had an internet boyfriend from England, and I have never met him, but we did the whole web cam, and talked on the phone a few times. I managed to fall pretty hard for him. We argued a lot of the time, but we still cared about each other enough to use the word love. I was upset with him, and he decided he would end it for me, because I refused to because I still loved him. Anyway I went to see a friend of mine for the first time,and he only lives a couple hours from me. I really started liking this guy, and I thought things were over with my bf. Nothing happened between me and the other guy. My now ex, wants me back.I really care about him a lot...soo much, he even has a couple of interviews a couple states away from me to be closer, I didn't know this until after we broke it off and I told him about this other guy. Well I really don't know what to do...I had an amazing time with my guy friend, and I think it really has potential. But I really care about my BF and I dont want to hurt either of them. IDK if you know anything about this... it's kinda wild... but advice, would be great if you can help.


ANSWER:
I personally have never had a long distance relationship nor an internet relationship. I know that you may think that you love him but I think that you might be in love with the idea of him. The truth of the matter is that until you actually spend time with someone, face to face, you cant really say that you know them, much less love them.

Regarding the long distance internet b/f, I think you should let him go and move on with your life. Even if he moves a couple of states away its still going to be long distance, which has already proven to be a stressful on your relationship. When you first start off in a relationship spending time together face to face is vital to building strong bonds as well as trust and respect. Also, having a long distance relationship opens the door to a lot of temptation to both of you.

Concerning the other guy I would say be careful. You are in a fragile and vulnerable state. You just broke up with your b/f. You don't want to jump into another relationship on the rebound. I would suggest taking it slow and try to lean towards staying friends with him, rather than start a new relationship. He's also long distance.

My final suggestions would be to date someone closer to home, stop looking for the man, and allow God to bring him to you. You will see that God's ways are much better than ours. You have no idea the good things that God has planned for those that love and obey Him.

I will be praying for God to give you the strength and the wisdom as your making your decision.

Love,
Trophy of Grace

P.S
- The women of WeUsed2bu love and care about your eternal soul. Therefore, we must tell you that there will be a day when each of us will have to stand before God and be judged for all we have done on this earth.
To find out how you can have right standing with God CLICK HERE


Have a question or topic idea?
Read Scriptures by Subject
Read our counselors' testimonies

Tiny Voice Telling Me To Let Go

Anonymous said...
I need advice… I am 23 years old and have been with my boyfriend for two years; he is my best friend and we have so much fun together when we aren’t fighting. We are both Christians and go to church every Sunday. He has a 4 year old son with another girl (which was upsetting for me because of her behavior towards me but we have gotten past that). He is satisfied with his relationship with God, even though he doesn't keep in His word (God's word) and only goes to church when I ask him to. I have trust issues with him because of what we went through with his ex in the past and the longer that we are together the harder it is for me to trust being so far from him (he lives an hour away). I know he loves me, he says he wants to marry me but we aren't obedient to God and although I am in charge of my own actions he does influence me a lot. On top of all that he doesn’t have his priorities straight, instead of paying off his bills he wants to put more money into his car. I wish he was more concerned about his career and his walk with God than tattoos and his car. I love him so much but I want to be with someone that loves God with all his heart. The fights we have tell me that maybe God doesn’t want us together but then again we have so much fun together. Should I stay in this relationship and trust God will help work things out or should I trust the tiny voice in my head telling me to just let go and move on?

Answer..My sweet sister in the Lord.. That tiny voice in your head is the Holy Spirit. He loves you so much. He has seen all you've gone thru in this relationship and like you said He is telling you to just let go and move on.

I would say based on everything that you have said you know what the right thing to do is. Be obedient to the leading of the Holy Spirit. He will never lead you the wrong way.

You know not everyone who says they are Christians are truly Christians. We are called to test the spirits. As Christians we are suppose have a personal relationship with Jesus, spend time with Him, read the Word, be doers of the Word, and go to church. Not because of a religion but because spending with Jesus reading the Word brings us knowledge and wisdom. This is how we become prepared for helping others and we become equipped to live a successful Christian life. We go to church because we need to be around other believers. Not only because they share the same faith, but because we need accountability. We need other strong believers to help us become strong too.

With all that being said..if the man you love is not doing the things above and claims to be a Christian..then he probably is not. God does not want us to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. He wants us to be with True Christians that love and serve Him.

Don't be lead by your emotions. Be lead by the Spirit of God. He knows what is best for you and has already put in your spirit what you should do. He will help you heal from this relationship. Trust me..the hurt won't last forever.

When you get a chance go to this link...

http://www.seekgod.org/bible/spiritguides.html

There are many scriptures there on the Guidance of the Holy Spirit...read them and be encouraged.

In Christ Love,

Trophy of Grace

Have a question or topic idea?

Read Scriptures by Subject

Read our counselors' testimonies

It's so hard to forgive

Question:
hello! I'm going to go ahead and tell you my story! I hope you dont mind! im a small town girl, i graduated in December of 07. my best friend in 9th grade was a big influence on me. she was not a virgin and i was, i wanted to be like her and when i hung out with her she always had a boyfriend. the end of our ninth grade year we each dated senior for a month or so and i lost my virginity! i told myself not to hang around her because i knew i was getting myself into trouble but i did it anyways! the summer of my ninth grade year i met Kenny! i was so in love! we broke up two years later and last summer i met Kelly Fisher, he was a great friend and always made me smile. we had a lot in common and both were Christians! i told my mom that i thought i found a special guy! she was happy for me, and last year on the 4th of July we kissed. i didn't think he felt the same. we started dating and in august he cheated on me with his ex girlfriend. i was heart broken and he knew it. in December he called me and told me that his little sister wanted to see me and hang out with me(she is 6) it was Christmas eve and he asked me to go to church with him and his family also. he took me out on our first date since our break up, and we have been inseparable since then. he tells me that im his soul mate and he is sorry from the bottom of his heart. and swears he will never do it again! its hard to believe him but i love him. he is deploying in August and I'm scared for my life. I'm scared he is going to cheat again and i don't know what to think... can you help me?

Answer:
Yes we can help... so heres whats i think.. To me it sounds like he loves you very much and just really needs you to forgive him and trust him. Everyone can make a mistake. And if hes trying to please God give him a chance. I went thorough the same things. I'm married now (just 2 weeks) and when we were dating (for 8 years) my b/f hurt me several times. In fact we hurt each other. God touched our hearts and we dedicated our lives to Christ. He is now a wonderful man. We both repented and asked God for forgiveness. Please be quick to forgive. We are only human. I'm not telling you to let someone walk all over you, we must forgive and use wisdom in all our relationships. I know that its painful, I've been there. Sometimes forgiveness is hard to do. And to forget is even harder. But for the sake of this relationship to work you have to let it go. Pray for him as he goes off to serve his country. Pray that the Lord will keep him under the wings of angels and bring him home to you safely.. I will be praying for you here!

With love,

Daughter of Destiny

Have a question or topic idea?
Read Scriptures by Subject
Read our counselors' testimonies

Seeking Godly Relationships

Recently I have been asked for advice on relationships. I just felt so much sorrow for these women and young women involved in unhealthy and ungodly relationships. It has been weighing on me to write about strong healthy relationships with Christ as your foundation.

God created a perfect match for you. You don't have to worry about finding him. First you need to seek out God and He will do the rest. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33) A womens heart should be so lost in God that a man needs to seek Him in order to find her.

We need to know what kind of person we are getting into a relationship with before making a commitment. The most important thing is to find out if the person has been born again in the Spirit of Christ. God wants you to have a man that loves and serves Him. Does he have evidence of being a follower of Christ or does he act like the rest of the world? Why is this so important when finding a partner? This man will be so in love with God he will do everything that pleases God. He will honor, respect, cherish and adore you. He WILL NOT cheat, lie, hurt, and leave you abandoned. He will lift you up and hold you in your time of need. He will help strengthen your relationship with Christ. Also just think if you have children with an unbeliever or person of a different belief how confusing will it be for that child. Will your child be raised to love and fear the Lord? Or will your child repeat, suffer, or inflict the same hurt and pain that you once were in?

When you are in a committed relationship with someone, it is so important to remember to love the Lord above anyone else. When you say or believe that your “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” is your "everything" or the most important thing in your life, this is called idolatry. Your committing a sin. God tells us to put him first in everything we do. Jesus himself reinforced that when the disciples asked Him, "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. (Matthew 22:36-38)

I just got married almost two weeks ago. In this marriage there is three of us. My husband, myself, and Jesus Christ. We both know that this would fail if we did not both share in our belief, faith, and trust in Him. We did not always have smooth sailing. We had our ups and rock bottoms. We both committed sins against each other and hurt one another constantly. My husband surrendered to the Lord and he is a new creation in Christ. We love, honor, respect, each other. We are now more kind, patient, and understanding. We have learned the importance of listening and praying together. Now our love for one another shines for everyone to see.

I believe whole heartedly that this is the best way to secure a foundation for a healthy godly realtionship. It will benefit you greatly. If you do decide to marry make sure that Jesus is the foundation of your relationship. When two people marry, they cleave to one another and become one flesh, which should be permanent and inseparable through Christ.

Written By:
Daughter of Destiny



Jeremiah 1:5, Jeremiah 29-11, 2 Peter 2:20, John 3:3-8, Philippians 2:5, 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, Matthew 10:37, 1 Corinthians 6:9-13, 2 Timothy 2:22, 1 Corinthians 6:18, Romans 12:9-10, Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5

Have a question or topic idea?
Read Scriptures by Subject
Read our counselors' testimonies

Relationship In Jeopardy

Anonymous ask.. My fiance is in the army and he says he loves me but the other night he invited a girl over to his place to watch movies alone on his bed. I found out about it and i asked him and he said that he planned it to hurt me but he loves me and doesn't want it to end. Is our relationship in jeopardy? I love him to death and I told him. I have been honest with him I just haven't been open with my feelings because he keeps lying to me. What do I do? Please can you help me?

Answer..I know how hurt you are. It is a terrible feeling to be betrayed by someone you love and are contemplating spending the rest of your life with. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Marriage is a serious commitment that too many young people take lightly. I urge you to really seek God's face about whether or not this man is for you. If he is going around watching movies on beds with other women, could he be sleeping with them too? If so, what if he brings you a venereal disease or worse Aids?

Sometimes God will shed the light on our circumstances so that we can see the Truth. He does not want us to be deceived. He wants to guide us and lead us if we will let Him, but the choice is ours. We can trust God or continue following our own deceitful hearts and ever changing emotions.

Please..please..before marrying this man. Pray with a sincere heart for God to help you make the right decision.I will be praying for you.

Sincerely,
Trophy of Grace

Have a question or topic idea?
Read Scriptures by Subject
Read our counselors' testimonies