I was born in Miami Beach to young parents. My mother was eighteen years old. She was studying to become a teacher. My father was a basketball coach. I am the oldest of three children. My parents provided us with everything we wanted and needed.
I was raised in Hialeah until I was eight when we moved to Hallandale. My parents had me enrolled in private school until I was in seventh grade. I wanted the experience of public school and begged my parents to let me go. I convinced my parents to allow me to attend public school for my eighth grade year. It did not take long for the straight ‘A’ student to let her grades drop. By the end of that school year I started cutting class. That summer was a pivotal point in my childhood with the changing of schools and my parents’ separation. I was devastated.
I was raised in Hialeah until I was eight when we moved to Hallandale. My parents had me enrolled in private school until I was in seventh grade. I wanted the experience of public school and begged my parents to let me go. I convinced my parents to allow me to attend public school for my eighth grade year. It did not take long for the straight ‘A’ student to let her grades drop. By the end of that school year I started cutting class. That summer was a pivotal point in my childhood with the changing of schools and my parents’ separation. I was devastated.
The beginning of High School I began to rebel from my mother and disobeyed her repeatedly. I ran away from home several times. Eventually I went to live with my father where there were no rules and no discipline. I had no idea what consequences were. Drugs, friends, and fighting became my everyday life. I was constantly getting suspended from school. I only attended ninety days of school my freshman year of high school.
I was completely out of control, full of rebellion, and disregarded all authority figures in my life. Before I knew it I was pregnant at sixteen. As soon as my father found out, he threw me out. I thought I could handle being a teenage mom and a single parent. I completed my GED while pregnant. This was probably the only smart thing I did at the time. My father reconsidered and allowed me to come home. When my daughter was three years old I allowed her to go to live with her father. This turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life. I regret it still to this day.
My father has always spoiled me. At fourteen years old my weekly allowance was $200 which was blown immediately. I was not permitted to get a job until I was eighteen years old. That is when he began to try to teach me the importance of earning my own way. By this time a monster had been created. I wanted to earn 40k a year at eighteen with no work experience. I wanted money fast. This impatient and selfish attitude led me straight to the go-go bars. I became an exotic dancer. I stepped into the worst lifestyle imaginable. This only led to more drug abuse and promiscuity. The wall around my heart grew taller. This is where I became best friends with alcohol. This relationship with alcohol lasted for 9 years.
Along this journey I meet my soon to be husband. We were both enabling and influencing each other with our destructive behavior and addictions. But God had a plan for both of us. He blessed us with our first daughter. I desired more than ever to be the mother to this baby that I had not been to my first one. I began going to church and bible studies with my sister in law and best friend who is a Christian. Shortly thereafter I received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. God blessed me with my third child at a time where I was feeling so alone and unsure of where my life was going.
God did not take my life and zap me perfect once I received His son. In fact my journey has not been easy. Allow I knew that I needed Jesus in my life I did not surrender to the idea of allowing him to manage my life too easily. But thank goodness we have a patient God.
Over the years I have learned the importance of trusting Him. I know that He has been watching over me and keeping me safe from my own evil ways. Today I long and need to help young women who need a direction in their lives. I have been through so many self inflicted dramas in my life. I hope that my advice can help someone. I am born to testify because I have overcome and am overcoming daily through the power of God’s spirit in me. I will never forget that I used to be you.
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