Hi, I love the advice y'all give, and I'm coming back for more! You may remember that my friend was involved in some pretty risky stuff. Maybe you don't remember! Haha. Anyway, my best friend and I are really close and we tell each other EVERYTHING. But lately, ever since she and her boyfriend went too far she hasn't really been talking to me as much. I know what she and her boyfriend is doing has gone on multiple times, and I'm afraid that she'll wind up pregnant. What's worse is my fear that she may already be, and it scares me. I know that the guy will leave her if she gets pregnant, and her parents wouldn't be very supportive if she did, and she would most likely get an abortion if she did get pregnant. So my questions are:1. If she's not pregnant, how do I talk to her about what she's doing?2. If she is pregnant/does get pregnant, how do I talk to her about it?3. And, how do I help her through whatever decision she makes, regardless of whether or not she's pregnant?
Daughter of The King said...
There are a lot of excellent articles and questions posted on our site that relate to sex outside of marriage. I suggest that you read up on the topic and pray before you speak to your friend; maybe you can print them out for her so she can read them on her own. Tell her that you care about her and that you know that what she is doing is only going to hurt her and you don't want to see her end up a mess.
If she is pregnant she's going to need a good friend to help her through the tough times. You can help influence her to choose life for her baby by letting her know that you will be there for her; you can share some simple facts about the baby in her womb, facts like:
- A baby hearts starts beating at 21 days after conception; that means that by the time she misses her first period there's a good chance her baby has a beating heart.
-At 6 weeks after conception the baby already has brain activity.
-At 8 weeks after conception (only 2 months) the stomach, liver, kidneys, and brain are functioning . At this point everything is already present that would be found in a person that is already born; The baby even has fingerprints!
-At 12 week (3months) the baby is the size of your thumb.
Sharing those facts with your friend may help her see the baby as a real person and not just some blob that she can get rid of. If she is pregnant I recommend that you take her to a pregnancy resource center; that's a place that will counsel your friend on the consequences of abortion. They will encourage her to choose life and many times they can help her with any needs she may have. You can find a pregnancy resource center near you by calling this toll free number 1-800-395-HELP (4357). All the services at a pregnancy resource center are free and confidential. I know that you are worried about your friend and you want to help her but please if your friend rejects your advice and decides to get an abortion do not support her in that decision; if you do you will be as guilty as she is for the murder of that baby. Do not go with her to the abortion clinic and do not lend her money for it; tell her that you care too much for her to help her do something so sinful and devastating to herself.
What I'm going to tell you next is going to be tough because I can tell that you care deeply about your friend but If she decides to continue with her destructive and sinful behavior you have to decide what kind of friend you're going to be. Are you going to be the kind of friend that just accepts what she does and just goes along with it? If you do that you are actually helping her sin. Or are you going to be the friend that says "Hey, I really care about you but I can't hang around with you and watch you hurt yourself. When you're ready for some changes let me know and I'll be here for you". I know that would be hard to do especially when you really care about someone but sometimes the best thing you can do for someone you love is walk away, keep her in prayer and leave her in the Lord's hands.
There are a lot of excellent articles and questions posted on our site that relate to sex outside of marriage. I suggest that you read up on the topic and pray before you speak to your friend; maybe you can print them out for her so she can read them on her own. Tell her that you care about her and that you know that what she is doing is only going to hurt her and you don't want to see her end up a mess.
If she is pregnant she's going to need a good friend to help her through the tough times. You can help influence her to choose life for her baby by letting her know that you will be there for her; you can share some simple facts about the baby in her womb, facts like:
- A baby hearts starts beating at 21 days after conception; that means that by the time she misses her first period there's a good chance her baby has a beating heart.
-At 6 weeks after conception the baby already has brain activity.
-At 8 weeks after conception (only 2 months) the stomach, liver, kidneys, and brain are functioning . At this point everything is already present that would be found in a person that is already born; The baby even has fingerprints!
-At 12 week (3months) the baby is the size of your thumb.
Sharing those facts with your friend may help her see the baby as a real person and not just some blob that she can get rid of. If she is pregnant I recommend that you take her to a pregnancy resource center; that's a place that will counsel your friend on the consequences of abortion. They will encourage her to choose life and many times they can help her with any needs she may have. You can find a pregnancy resource center near you by calling this toll free number 1-800-395-HELP (4357). All the services at a pregnancy resource center are free and confidential. I know that you are worried about your friend and you want to help her but please if your friend rejects your advice and decides to get an abortion do not support her in that decision; if you do you will be as guilty as she is for the murder of that baby. Do not go with her to the abortion clinic and do not lend her money for it; tell her that you care too much for her to help her do something so sinful and devastating to herself.
What I'm going to tell you next is going to be tough because I can tell that you care deeply about your friend but If she decides to continue with her destructive and sinful behavior you have to decide what kind of friend you're going to be. Are you going to be the kind of friend that just accepts what she does and just goes along with it? If you do that you are actually helping her sin. Or are you going to be the friend that says "Hey, I really care about you but I can't hang around with you and watch you hurt yourself. When you're ready for some changes let me know and I'll be here for you". I know that would be hard to do especially when you really care about someone but sometimes the best thing you can do for someone you love is walk away, keep her in prayer and leave her in the Lord's hands.
Sincerely,
